Depressed.

I do not suffer from "depression" in the manic classic sense of the word.  Never have...and had a REALLY hard time understanding it when I realized how many people in my life suffer from it chronically. 

BUT, these past couple of weeks I have been DRAGGING.  As in...don't want to get out of bed, exhausted - but not sleeping well, cranky, unmotivated (eeeek!  you should see my house) and just basically in a FUNK.

And then a few days ago as I was IM chatting with John I said to him, "I think I'm depressed."  Jokingly.  And then I realized.  Holy cow.  I AM depressed. 

I miss my husband

I had a leaky sink

I couldn't get the new showerhead on by myself.

My baby is two

I have too much STUFF in my house and nowhere to put it.

Holidays are here and they are just a tad lonely

I worry about my mom (who is getting hip replacement surgery TODAY.)

I worry about my madmad...and her little moods

I don't want to sweep any more leaves off the front stoop.

I look outside and all I see is rain...or this morning it was snow.

Cooking has essentially been opening a can for the last couple of weeks.

I burst into tears when I leave Bella in daycare because I know she's just going to cry for the next hour until I pick her back up.  (separation anxiety is just as bad for me...)

Plus, I still need to get her vaccination shots and it makes me tear up every time I think about her getting those needles in the leg.

AND...last but not least, I hate putting folded laundry away and you should see the pile of it that I am dreading...

I have become SUCH a softie.  I used to be able to write out a to do list and tadum!  It all got done.  Not now...now I am wallowing.  But wallowing makes me feel unproductive which for me is a bad way to feel.

(sigh)

Ok... so that was good for me to wallow just a little more...and now I'm done feeling sorry for myself and tomorrow...after I try for a full 7 hours of sleep...tomorrow I will write out my to do list and get it done.

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